My magical wand.

I cannot believe it has been another week!
Again!

I had supermany ideas about all the magic I wanted to create this week, but oh no. I sit now on wednesday evening, and I have just spent five minutes creating my magical wand. It doesn't feel bad though. I picked the stick several weeks ago because I just liked it. And it has been sitting on the desk where I am supposed to work since. I don't do any work there. I just put things there, and then when I feel like working or creating I spread the stuff out all over the appartment. And then when I'm done I curse the hardship of womenhood because we always have to tidy up so much :).

There has been a tiny bit of magic this week though. I have been stressing more and more about my situation, as you know. But yesterday when I sat translating a "thing" I am working on I came across a question I used a lot in my work with people suffering from stressrelated diseases or existential/lifesituatoin dilemmas/problems:

What is my life task right now?


It was asked by a psychologist called Erik E. Eriksson in his book about human development through the different ages of a lifetime. His perspective was that in every stage of life there is a certain task in focus. And this task is something most of what we do circulates around. For example when we are teenagers our task is to search for an identity - so we do a lot of experimenting with clothes, taste in music, political opinions, how we relate to the other sex and so on. I used the question to make people think of what the main thing they need to do right now is about. And I figured, ok, I'll ask myself.

And the answer burst out imediatly: To be a mother to my children. That is pretty obvious to everyone I suppose, but to me it felt like a welcome revelation. This is what I need to do. Be a mother. Everything else is secondary. Of course I need to find an income, but that is secondary to mothering. And it was like a big sigh went through my body and released a loooooot of tension.

And you know what? Suddenly I found energy, and joy, and patience, and a desire to create and ideas to turn into creations. MAGIC!

Very simple and maybe banal, but that's allright by me :). The words are: Joy, love, From now on my life shall be magical. Mama Nature will mother me so I can bring magic to my kids.

What magic happend this week in your life?