This is something I actually drew quite a long time ago. I was in my twenties and filled with fear and an undefined longing for "something". This something was supposed to fill the void I was carrying within and help me become this wonderful person I hoped was in there somewhere. And I drew this picture. I found it when I went threw my creative stuff the other day. I wanted sort of to see wether this vision of myself as an artist is just a fantasy freak that I've made up to console myself or wether there might actually be some truth to it. And I found lots of things. Horrible things and beautiful things. Most of all these things tell me the story of someone who really wants something, but over and over again runs into or makes up obstacles not to get it. About feeling different and strange and afraid to go for it and let that strange light shine the way it wants to.
Today I have given birth to two children I deeply appriciate and love, and thrive in caring for. Now is the time to also care for my tiny artist inside so she may grow. I owe it to myself, and I owe it to my children so they learn that dreams are worth fighting for, and that even though you feel different and like you don't belong you are totally loveable and it's aloud to love oneself and all these other things you want your children to know! I still feel this strong longing to express myself and be creative and feel that I carry lot's of ideas and projects to be born. I "just" have to challenge the fears of failure, of being a horrible mother, of never having any money etcetera if I follow my dream, and then I'll get there, surely?
What fears have you encountered/conquered? What is your special light?
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